Petar’s House: It’s a Very Very Very Fine House

And we cried all the way home….

And we are home. Tired, but grateful. Hands cut, burned, scraped and blistered from our labor of love. If you haven’t read After The Flood: Bijeljina Bosnia 2014, you may need to as context for this article. Above, the outside table is where all coffee and all meals are taken throughout the entire summer. The smoke house, just to the right (not in this photo), with the flowers growing upside it, is the outdoor kitchen. The heat and humidity is stifling so the house is kept dark and cool as a refuge for a quiet nap in the heat of the afternoon each day. Above, the entrance is to the left of the long table.  Can you find your way to it? I am taking you on a tour, today.

Upon entering, you will find the front hall (now immaculate). It is actually a larger room that attaches the older part of the home with the newer (still very old) addition to the home: the bathroom and second bedroom. Pava always had fruit in a bowl at the front entry for the family, upon arrival. (The bathroom is directly in front of the door and to the right of the table; Igor’s bedroom is to the left. You can just see a little image of the new sofa bed.)

Pava and Petar were orphaned during WWII. Petar was the eldest of his siblings at 10; Pava was the baby of hers, at 3. Petar had an uncle who took his family in. Pava and her siblings were displaced from a village nearby Bosanski Novi in Northwest Bosnia to Kozarci, Serbia during the war, and completely on their own to fend for themselves. Eleven-year-old Niko took on the fathering role in Pava’s family; 10 year old Zora, the mothering, but everyone worked together, to survive.

Pava and Petar are both valiant survivors of extreme circumstances – from their youth, and again, through the Bosnian war, where they lost everything again, after building a beautiful family and life together, to include 2 homes. She was a teacher, and he a financial advisor.

But they knew love. They were inseparable, full of the utmost respect for one another, and worked side by side every day of their lives with the power of knowing that together, they could overcome the most horrific circumstances. And then Pava died. Petar was inconsolable. This strong, independent, wise elderly gentleman was forever changed that night. After 53 years with the love of his life, he no longer owned an independent frame of reference for survival. He was hollow, lonely, and empty. He cried. And cried. And cried.

Igor and his family is coming today to see the fruits of our labour this past 3 weeks – and I have put the little gift from Pava for them on the table. The collage of Petar’s hand with his plums was an exercise I did a few years ago in art class after visiting one year (another long story) where we visited their summer home (bombed in the war) and he found plums on his tree! I still recall the joy on his face that day.

And just when spring gave birth to new beginnings in the garden, and planted her seeds of hope and warmth of the new season this May, after Pava’s death, the rain came and washed away everything Petar and Pava had owned together. It came so powerfully and so quickly that Petar was playing cards in the afternoon with a friend and a neighbor knocked on his door. “What are you doing in here, playing cards? The town is flooding! You must evacuate!” Moments later, Nikola appeared, rain in the yard already almost to the knees, and by the time they had reorganized the precious possessions in the home to be raised as best they could and moved the baby chickens to safety – the water in the yard was almost thigh high and filled their boots as they escaped, with only 2 bags…. And though Petar was there, he was completely lost.

The refurnished front entry is reminiscent of the old one, as there is still a place for everything, yet different.

If you turn around and look back out the front door where you came in, this is what you will see. This is the family “living room and kitchen” all summer long.Every family has an outdoor table, outdoor sink and outdoor kitchen.

For the past three months, Petar has been working hard every day to recover his home and his life so soon after losing the love of his life. He is 80 years old. And crying.

Remember that the washroom and the bedrooms are immediately in front of you when you entered through the door? To the right, just past the coat cupboard, are double doors (see them, above, in dark brown) into the old original part of the home. There is another “entry” that has now become a hallway utility room where the fridge, deep freeze and a shoe and new storage cupboard are housed.

Looking back into the hall/utility space from the living room, you can see the fridge and deep freeze on the right of the hall and the new storage cabinet to the left. He has his tools and every little piece of household “junk” like batteries, keys, tape, etc…. now organized in that cabinet.

We arrived in mid August. The sun was shining. So much work done by Igor and neighbours after the flood, and so much still to do. Three months Petar had lived in a damp house with piles of stuff everywhere. Our time together this past three weeks was one of great healing for all. And together, we put his house in order.

 

 

Above is the living room with his new furniture. Keep in mind that Petar is 80. We furnished for function, not design and beauty. But, it was still so beautiful to all. And bittersweet, as we wished we could have done all of this 10 years ago for Pava and Petar to enjoy, together. But, 10 years ago, times were different for all of us. We washed, and sorted, and trashed, and scrubbed and organized. We bought furniture and kitchen cabinets. We discovered items Petar had no idea were there and made a place for everything.

We filled three huge white storage bins with Pava’s needlework. One completely with crocheted table cloths and doilies. One with white linens and one with cut lace work, needlepoint and cross stitch. Every piece was ironed, flat, and gorgeous.

The compilation of family books was dusted and displayed. There is a complete cabinet stock full of sljive (the traditional home distilled plum brandy).

And there is Petar’s chair. All he wanted was a comfy chair and he was happy with this. I made sure we bought him a little drawered side table for his medication, phone numbers, and special papers. My dad used to have a table with everything within reach and I wanted the same for Petar.

Now, this is an L-shaped room. There is the living room immediately to the right upon entering the utility hall, and the kitchen is behind the wall where the fridge and freezer are in that hall, open to the living room space.

Between these two spaces, we bought an extra cabinet for all of the dishes that Pava used to pile on a table when she moved into the kitchen in the house for the winter cooking. Now, there is room for everything in a cupboard.

Above is the old kitchen, but ready to have the new one installed. We have purchased the new table and taken out the cabinet with the drawers beside the sink. I wanted to remove the old wood burning stove and put cabinets there, but Vanja said that is security for the winter, should the power ever go out: there is a wood burning stove.

Belwo, is the kitchen with the new cabinets.

The table and chairs are tiny, but Petar is small and it fits in this space perfectly. I love this kitchen and knowing where everything is in this house and that there is a place for it all… and that it is all so clean, now.

Except the windows. We didn’t wash the windows.

The kitchen is open to the utility hall from the front hall that leads to the living room (on the right). You can walk straight into the kitchen through that utility hall – right past the fridge. There is also another door opposite the end of the hall where the door to the living room is. That is the door to Petar’s bedroom and that is the one room I didn’t photograph as we were staying in it and it had our suitcases in it … but the bed and night tables that we had made for them 2 years ago will stay. The legs need to be sanded and repaired. The new mattress was trash, but there is now another new mattress and new cupboards in that room, too.

The wood burning stove, above, is used like a buffet, really. The bread and fruit and snacks sit on it during the day, and the hot food in the cold months during a meal. Vanja and Petar even took a day (+37 degrees) and reorganized, sorted, trashed and cleaned everything in the storage shed. Below is the new cabinet in Igor’s room. I didn’t get a photo of the sofa bed there, either.

We took 12.5 full days to do everything. Including buying all of the furniture. One could never work at that pace here. But, everything is different there – as you see. We had so many laughs, really good food, and on the last day, we declared a day of rest for the following day. We went out for a lovely meal and celebrated our time and work together. And though we cried all the way home… we know we have done everything we could possibly do and that Petar’s house is now a very, very, very fine and cozy house, filled with the tender touch of all who love him.

The kitchen cabinets were put in last – on the Friday at 5pm. Lori and Igor arrived on Saturday morning to see everything and we celebrated again that night with one of Petar’s famous rostilj’s… a carnivore’s delight and a family day that soothed aching hearts and renewed the hope for the future.